Self Motivational Help to be Happy when Sad

Posted on February 14th, 2010 by admin in self motivational

Self motivational people know that their mood is controlled internally by how they respond to external stimuli. If you can take this principle on board you will realise that no matter how badly the world is treating you there is no need to compound it by making yourself miserable.

The first step in improving your mood is to realise that by being aware of the sad feeling and where it emanates from you can begin to do something about it. Its not that self motivational people never have sad feelings it’s just that they latch onto it quicker and begin to manage the situation. They may not be able to change the outside influence that is causing the sadness but they know that they can control their reaction to it. Now I am not suggesting that you ignore sad feelings, sometimes it is your mind sending you signals that you shouldn’t dismiss. For example if you suffer a bereavement of a family member or close friend I am not suggesting you put on a grin from ear to ear and start bouncing off the walls. In such an instance the grieving process requires that you do reflect on this loss. However those who dwell on it for too long never get through the grieving process and it begins to affect both their physical and mental health. Self motivational people move on from feeling sorry for themselves for the loss to celebrating the life of the person who has passed on. Now the grieving process is a lot more complicated than this and needs to be the subject of a longer discussion than here. However I hope it demonstrates that the control is in the hands of the person feeling sad.

So after recognising the sad feeling and why your mind wants to remind you of something, the next stage is to let go of that feeling. This is not to deny the feeling but to realise that in the long term it is not helping you. It is more than an old wife’s tale to say that if you send out negative vibrations to the world you will receive back similar negative vibes. To achieve this you need to begin to live in the now. Self motivational people don’t like to spend a lot of time mulling over negative things that happened in the past nor do they spend too much time anticipating things going wrong in the future. They live in the now and deal with their emotions in the present. If the sadness is caused by someone who has wronged you in the past if you forgive them in the present it is you who benefits by letting go of the grudge. If you find this difficult you will be much more self motivational when you realise that no amount of brooding will change the past but you can change how you feel in the present. Also by living in the now you can focus on what actions you need to take to move forward into a positive tomorrow. Again self motivational people focus on the solution to overcome a sad situation rather than dwelling on the cause or the source. Overall you need to begin to focus on all the wonderful things around you, a baby’s smile, a beautiful sunset, a piece of inspirational music, a funny film etc. If you need further help take a look at my self motivational book list.

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